Author Archives: admin

Ken from Footwear finally snaps, shoots up a display of Nikes, puts a cluster of hollow-point rounds through a cardboard standee of Lebron. I’m kinda glad when that stupid headband is lopped off by gunfire. Always hated that thing. Ken … Continue reading →

There was this chick I ran cross country with in high school. Amber. She had buck teeth and the nicest legs I ever seen.  Ballsiest chick I ever knew. Wildest, too. One time we’re at this end-of-summer party, right? One … Continue reading →

An intro to you You burn bridges. Piss in the wind. Tug on Superman’s cape.  Caution is not your friend. You’ve broken three teeth. Seen the dentist five times this year. He pretends like he’s worried about you but is … Continue reading →

The mom with the abs uses a Zodiac to stalk the dolphins.  After her kids are in bed, after her husband gives her an insufficient cornholing, she drags the inflatable boat to the beach. Puts the oars in the locks, … Continue reading →

EXT: TOSCHE STATION CONVENIENCE STORE (Sign in window reads “POWER CONVERTERS 50% OFF”) INT: Bored LUKE SKYWALKER hunches over checkout counter, absentmindedly flips through an issue of Luscious Landspeeders & Tantalizing Twi’leks. A bell above the door tinkles, and LUKE … Continue reading →